A Praying Life (Ch. 1-11) By Paul E. Miller
Paul E. Miller's
"A Praying Life" starts by addressing why prayer often frustrates us,
then shows where prayer can take us. The first part teaches how to approach God
with childlike trust. The second part digs into the grown-up attitudes that
actually block us from praying well. Together, they help move us from
struggling with prayer to living a life of prayer.
1. How did the author engage with or challenge
your thinking?
Paul E. Miller
challenged and deepened my understanding of prayer in several ways. First, he
writes, “You can’t have a good story without tension and conflict, without
things going wrong. Unanswered prayers create some of the tensions in the story
God is weaving in our lives.” This helped me see my unanswered prayers not
as failures, but as meaningful parts of God's greater plan.
Second, he confronted
my habit of limiting prayer to fixed times, such as morning personal devotion
or evening family prayer time, by stating, “If you are not praying, then you
are quietly confident that time, money, and talent are all you need in life.
You’ll always be a little too tired, a little too busy...” (p. 46). This raised
questions, “what am I doing apart from morning and evening prayers? Am I not
relying on my resources rather than God while I am not praying?” In this way, the
author showed me how pride can lead me to rely on my own resources rather than
God.
Third, he expanded this
point practically, saying, “A praying life isn’t simply a morning prayer
time; it is about slipping into prayer at odd hours of the day... realizing
that we can’t even walk through a mall or our neighborhood without the help of
the Spirit of Jesus.” (p. 61). This challenged me to make prayer a constant
part of my life, not just a scheduled activity.
Lastly, Miller warned, “If
Satan can’t stop you from praying, then he will try to rob the fruit of praying
by dulling your soul. Satan cannot create, but he can corrupt.” (p. 69).
This statement reminded me to remain spiritually alert even when I am
prayerful, because Satan aims to undermine the effect of prayer through
distraction and dullness.
2. How did the content reinforce your existing
thoughts?
The book reinforced
some of my existing thoughts in a few ways. The author says, “American
culture is probably the hardest place in the world to learn to pray. We are so
busy that when we slow down to pray, we find it uncomfortable… When we aren’t
working, we are used to being entertained. Television, the Internet, video
games, and cell phones make free time as busy as work… Our trust in ourselves
and in our talents makes us structurally independent of God.” (p. 19). I
have felt this way before, and his words reassured me that I should not waste
my free time but I should work hard to build a habit of prayer. I have already
cut out all social media (except WhatsApp for important updates like church
events), and his explanation gave me more confidence to keep going with what I
am doing.
I also have a habit of
praying out loud. It is not to show off but I just feel more connected and
focused when I do. Paul E. Miller confirmed this when he wrote, “Praying out
loud can be helpful because it keeps you from getting lost in your head. It
makes your thoughts concrete. But it is more than technique; it is also a
statement of faith. You are audibly declaring your belief in a God who is
alive.” (p. 45). His words encouraged me to keep praying this way.
3. What were the most powerful learning
moments—and why were they so?
There were a few
moments in the book that really stood out to me.
First, the author says,
“Prayer mirrors the gospel. In the gospel, the Father takes us as we are
because of Jesus and gives us his gift of salvation. In prayer, the Father
receives us as we are because of Jesus and gives us his gift of help. We look
at the inadequacy of our praying and give up, thinking something is wrong with
us. God looks at the adequacy of his Son and delights in our sloppy, meandering
prayers.” (p. 51). This was so freeing! This reminded me that God does not
expect perfect prayers but honest ones.
Second, Paul E. Miller
writes, “As I began to pray regularly for the children, he began to work in
their hearts... It didn’t take me long to realize I did my best parenting by
prayer. I began to speak less to the kids and more to God. It was actually
quite relaxing… When you open a door to God, you find some amazing treasures
inside.” (p. 54-56). This hit me hard. I stopped reading for a minute and
thought about how I parent my kids, Jenchung and Kalan. I realized I need to
talk more to God about them instead of always lecturing them.
Third, the author says,
“A principal source of cynicism comes from looking up at Christian leaders
who have gotten Jesus’ kingdom mixed up with their own. Ministry itself can
create a mask of performance, the projection of success. Everyone wants to be a
winner. In contrast, Jesus never used his power to show off. He used his power
for love.” (p. 86). This was a good wake-up call. Even though this book is
about prayer, it made me check my own heart and motives, especially in
ministry.
4. How has the author
increased your interest in this topic?
The author made me more
interested in prayer by showing how real it is in his own life. He shares
personal stories like about his daughter Kim and his wife Jill that helped me
see he is not just teaching theory but he is writing from real struggles and experiences
with God. Those illustrations from his family and personal life made me want to
go deeper in my own prayer life. The way he writes does not just inform me but
it stirs something inside me, making me hungry to learn more. Because of his
honest and lived out examples, I have grown even more interested in
understanding and practicing prayer.
5. Would you recommend
this book to anyone—who and why?
Yes, I would definitely
recommend this book especially to my wife, Dorcas. Even if she is too busy to read
it right now, I will share the key lessons I have learned especially Miller’s
wisdom on speaking more to God for my two kids rather than speaking more to
them. We both want to build a strong Christian home and raise godly kids, but
without prayer, that dream is not possible. Talking to our kids and setting
rules alone will not create lasting change. But when we combine instruction
with prayer, that is when real transformation happens. This book has shown me
just how vital prayer is in parenting, and I know these truths could help
Dorcas too.
This book did not just teach me about prayer but it
invited me into a praying life. Now I see unanswered prayers and daily
struggles as opportunities to trust God more. Moving forward, I want my home to
be built not on perfect discipline, but on persistent prayer, knowing that only
God can change me, my wife and kids. Paul E. Miller’s wisdom will linger!
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